Hello dear readers, and welcome to another edition of the Gimli Gazette, your one-stop shopping spot for truth, justice, and the Gimli way.
I begin with a question from one of my session participants. They write, “Are you excited about the two baby goats coming to the ranch? Are you jealous that they get tutus and you do not?”
Thank you for this two-part question. As for the first question, the two goats are scheduled to arrive around June 1st. I am very excited about their arrival. All ranch animals bring great joy to the children, so the more the merrier! I’m sure that they will fit right in with the other ranch residents.
Another good feature about having more goats on the ranch is possibly future production of goat milk. This can also be made into soap, which I hear will be excellent for my skin. I know what you’re thinking — “Your complexion is already perfect, Gimli. Don’t change it!” Rest assured my friends. The soap will simply make my coat shine brighter. The paparazzi will have to put filters on their camera lenses to adjust for my new radiance.
As for my being jealous about not getting to wear a tutu, I think that we can all agree that tutus do not look very attractive on horses. It would not be fashion forward of me to wear one. Besides, I have moved beyond ballet and into other contemporary forms of dance. While most horses are content with Dressage, I have become rather skilled in Ballroom, Jazz, and Tap (I refuse to Twerk!). I have been asked to appear on Dancing with the Stars, but I could not fit it into my schedule. The children always come first!
I am happy to announce that Ladyhawke will be returning to session duty with the children starting in June. It is good that she has recovered enough to be out in the arena with the youngsters. She has been greatly missed by adults and children alike. I know that she is looking forward to being involved in sessions once again.
In other happy news, I will finally be returning to my old paddock. I trust that Miss Mo and Mr. John have made all of the upgrades which I had requested. It will be good to be closer to my beloved Ladyhawke once again, as well as to my recording studio for 3am production work.
It was OK being located close to Connor during the interim, but he does not always appreciate my sense of humor and my sardonic wit. Miss Mo likes me right in the middle of the other two horses so that I can keep an eye on things while I am running the ranch.
Well that’s all for this week. It looks like it will be a great summer of activity at Mercy Spring Ranch. I hope you will stop by and see me if you find yourself in my NEIGHborhood (I could not resist that horse pun).
Happy Trails,
Gimli May 22, 2023